A Serious Lesson Or Two

Marki stood in the middle Diagon Alley, strumming the ukulele she had received for Christmas, humming tunelessly. She heard a few people pause curiously as they heard her playing and decided maybe it was time to give them something to stare at. She thought of one of her favorite songs, from a band called Flight of the Conchords. She began to sing the song.

"In the marmalade forest, between the make believe trees. In a cottage cheese cottage, lives Albi, Albi, Albi, Albi! Albi, the racist dragon." She finished the musical intro and began to continue to the story of the song, the racist dragon meeting the badly burned Albanian boy and learning the lesson, that everyone was different. She even used character voices, a high squeaky voice for the boy, a grumbling, low one for Albi. Once the song finished and Albi recovered from his racism.

"So they sat in the cave- the cave- and ate bubble gum pie- YUM! Ali the racist- well not anymore!- draaaaagon!" She strummed violently and then released the stings, looking up to greet her audience, if she even had one left. Typically, her "interesting" choices of songs scared people off.

Michael had come to Diagon Alley. He was heading for the menswear shop where he had purchased a full gross of black socks. Bloody Rob Dent had somehow found a second enchanted footstool. A lovesick one who believed it was a female cocker spaniel. The silly thing had been reupholstered in carnation pink chintz, of all things. Rob had given Michael the footstool for Christmas as a companion for the enchanted ottoman, Otto, that had come as part of the furnished cottage he was renting from Robert. And both the stupid footstools ate his socks. He had given into it and had decided if he bought a full gross, 144 pair of black socks, he might have a couple pair for himself for awhile until the furniture ate them. He'd stopped at the shop, picked up his order, and now had the large box tucked under his arm and was heading off to find some decent Earl Grey.

He heard the unusual song of the young girl who was playing a ukelele. Well, now that wasn't something he saw every day. Guitars, maybe. Ukeleles, no. But, actually, he liked it. He liked that she had a taste for the unusual. That amused him. In an odd way, he reminded her of Tessie O Shea, one of the most famous ukelele players in the muggle world, and a fellow Brit.

"Well, if it isn't Tessie," he said to her. "Racist dragons? Well, aren't they all a bit racist? Most of them believe anything smaller than they are aren't worth anything except for dragon food. At least that's been my experience with them. Is that muggle music? I like it. And I do, very much, like the ukelele. It is a very under-appreciated instrument. And besides that, Diagon Alley can be a rather dismal place at times. Its nice to see you lightening it up a bit. So tell me, Tessie, how is it that you aren't playing and singing in Sparks and getting paid for it?"

Marki did have an audience, it seemed. Of one. Still, that was one more than she usually had. Most of her antics went either unnoticed by her peers, or was very noticed, spread around the castle like wildfire by word of mouth, and then she noticed for the next day she was at the same status of a leper for the following days. She would not mind if humans were not social creatures. She did need companionship too. Even social lepers needed love.

But who needed human companionship when she had Jeremiah, the bullfrog that was currently nestled in the hood of her jacket. she faced the man who was addressing her and gave him a vacant smile. "Actually, I always thought dragons were fairly fair. They don't hate certain peoples, just all people equally. No discrimination when it comes to eating."

She cocked her head and continued. "Yes. By a band called Flight of the Conchords. Most people don't get them. And ukulele is very underrated. I haven;'t been playing long and I knew that. I stick with guitar and drums mostly. And yes, that was my sentiments exactly, though I do seem to have scared people off more than welcomed them."

She held out a hand, saying, "My name is Marki, but you can call me Tessie if you want. I get called a lot of names, but never Tessie!" She grinned in sort of a bemused way and there was a loud croak from behind her. "Oh, don't mind that. that's Jeremiah, my bullfrog." She pointed at the band in his hands. "That's a lot of socks. Do you run outside in socks like I do? I get sent socks every week it's so bad."

Sophia walked down the packed street of Diagon Alley heading towards the quill and parchment shop to get some more quills and parchment for her office at St. Mungo's. As she heard a girl singing a weird and awkward song she stopped and listened closely. It wasn't a bad song, very good indeed but very different from other songs she heard. "You know, your quite good; different but good."said Sophia giving her a soft warm smile. Sophia's eyebrows raised at the odd man for he was a bit off his rocker but then all old mans seem to be that way at times Sophia thought it was rather funny.

Sophia was a singer and a song writer herself but her songs were mainly on her life experience and what others have went through. "So you planning on being a singer?"Sophia asked her softly but curiously not but in a nosey way. This girl sure had talent even though it was in a weird and awkward way but she could tell this girl was different which wasn't bad for Sophia liked different unique people. "Oh so rude of me, I'm Sophia Lestrange."said Sophia to the girl and then the man. Meeting odd and unique people Sophia loved for she was different and unique herself but some people called her a freak for who she was.

"You have a very keen wit, you know that, Tessie? I'm Michael. I always appreciate being in the company of someone wise and with good taste. And what a good pet. Frogs are great pets. Its what I took to Hogwarts when I was there. I wasn't very imaginative with his name, though. I called him Flypaper. We didn't have one fly in Gryffindor while he was there. Hence the rather obvious name. I like Jeremiah better. The toughest part of having him as a pet was keeping Horace Slughorn from snatching him from me for use in one of his obscure potions. Horace was a bit odd, even by my standards. And I love individuality. Horace went beyond that, on almost every occasion. In point of fact, though, if I am honest, I probably pushed him to it. I had a love back then of, well, shall we say, ligtening up the classroom just a wee bit? I didn't know back then how he always knew it was me. I thought I was an expert at subtleness.

"And I guess this box of socks is not very subtle either. I have, somehow, become the owner of a pair of enchanted footstools that believe they are male and female cocker spaniels. And for some reason, they eat a steady diet of black socks. It isn't bad enough that I have one that does that, but now some so-called friend gave me a mate for him, and she's upholstered in bloody pink chintz. I cannot honestly say that I am a great lover of pink chintz, myself. I hope they don't decide they are going to procreate more sock eaters. I have no idea what I will do with a litter of miniature footstools running through the house and barking and peeing on my rugs.

"In all seriousness, you really ought to go see the owner of Sparks. She's been considering adding some live music, in a bit of the muggle coffeehouse style, a couple of nights a week. You might well get the job. You ought to check into it. You have a good voice, and you play well. And she pays well, and her employees eat free. Most people can do with a bit more cash."

He looked at the new young woman who had walked up. "Sophia Lestrange? Really? So YOU'RE Skinny's daughter! He mentioned you. I'm Michael. I'm a fringe member of the Lupin clan, I suppose. I'm Khaat's godfather."

Marki liked that he talked quite a lot. Usually, it was her job to uphold the conversation, because she was so odd they were not sure what to say. But it seemed she had met someone with their own quirky sort of mind and she was not having to have the obligation of holding the conversation up on her own. Not bad. She could get used to this... Not that she would. She still frightened her peers.

"I think the footstools should be trained for the circus... Then you could use it as a threat." She jumped up onto a bench and pointed at the ground, yelling in a low, booming voice, "'You eat another one of my socks and I'll ship you off to the circus! You can balance a seal by the nose!'" She hopped down, thinking it was funny since seals usually balanced the footstools, not the other way around.

"I may do that over the summer. I have school though and I'm much to busy pushing myself onto peers that will never truly accept me." She smiled lightly, as though commenting on the weather and blinked, looking at the new girl. "A lot of people call me different but they mean weird. Is that what you mean? If so, thank you. I don't plan on being a singer. I sound like a toad. Jeremiah might try. I want to be a muggle physicist. Or a one-armed drummer. With an eye patch." Don't ask her why she wanted to be a one-armed drummer. She had heard it somewhere and loved it. "Nice to meet you Sophia. I read about you in the Daily Prophet." Others might have treated the situation delicately, but Marki was sort of bold and oblivious, a deadly combination. Jeremiah hopped out of her hood and landed on the bench. She scooped him up and made a croaking noise at him before plopping him into her hood.

Sophia laughed her tinkling bell laugh and nodded at Michael. "Yes I'm his daughter."said Sophia remembering his father mentioning that he had so many nicknames. "My father and Khaat told me alot about you as well, it's nice to finally meet you."said Sophia giving him a soft warm smile. Sophia turned to the girl and shook her head. "No, that's what I meant but being weird makes you different so stay true to yourself."said Sophia giving her a soft warm smile. Sophia laughed and shook her head for she seemed always in the Daily Prophet. "Yeah, I'm seem to be in there more then anything now days."said Sophia sighing. "I'm a trouble magnet, I think my father is going crazy or I think he already is!"said Sophia chuckling.

Sophia wished to go back to her norma; old ways when she didn't get into trouble and she was sweet and innocent. "Ha, that's a laugh!"Sophia thought to herself laughing to herself at the thought of her being back to her old self. Sophia would never be normal again not after so many things she been through in her life, but it only made her stronger. "You should really try to sing at the Leaky Cauldron or Khaat's place like Michael said I'm sure she'll let you she's really understanding."said Sophia softly. Sophia looked back at Michael and smiled. "So if I may ask, how did you meet my father?"Sophia asked him softly for she was sure it would be an interesting story.

Sophia's father always told her old crazy Michael and he was always off his rocker at times not to mention she seen him a couple of times. "Aren't you the one that saved me from Felix?"Sophia asked him softly not remembering if she was right or not. Although she thought she was but her memory had been fried since then.

"Oh, and now you disappointment me, Tessie," Michael laughed. "I was so hoping you'd bring a good old fashioned skiffle band to Diagon Alley. Something very Lonnie Donegan. That would turn some heads. Wizards have no bloody clue what good skiffle music is. I would think it might be something, that with your creative mind, you could refresh and introduce it to Britain's wizarding ignorant. Oh of course it would have to have really good stout on hand, and maybe some authentic Hawaiian luau cuisine. That is, if you think you could stand being seen a bit more individualistic than you are right now. Personally, I think it sounds like a great evening. A bit of Kahlua pork, a pint of stout, and some skiffle rightfully fronted by a ukelele. I have a vintage hawaiian shirt that is worth thousands of American muggle dollars. I would think you could add your own spin to it this summer and make it a style item. Make yourself known. As for myself and my friends, I know we'd turn out. Certainly beats deep fried everything in the pubs."

"Laura Croft here has a valid point," He gestured towards Sophia. "It would never do for you to try to conform. First of all, it isn't you. You'd be only acting at best. Second of all, its dreadfully boring. And, you don't seem to like boredom and the expected any more than I do. And third, you're better than the norm. You are far more gifted than that. Your sense of identity is a rare gift, and a treasure. Don't waste your time being dismayed by those who don't understand you. When you make use of the gifts you're given, now that, my dear Tessie, is the true joy in life, and the only real success there is.


He turned to Laura. "So, how did I meet Skinny? Um. Let me think. Ozzy introduced me to him. Oh, sorrry. Robert, that is. I went to a meeting to help rescue Khaat from Barker the first time he had her, and Robert had invited Skinny to that. And, yes, I was the one who got you out of Barker. Barker wasn't bright enough to remember I had found him there with Khaat just a short while before and he took you to the same place. That really was quite stupid on his part, but it did make it considerably easier to find you. You look like you are doing well. If it were me, Barker wouldnt make me nearly as crackers as the constant press coverage. I rather like reading the paper, not being read about in it."

Sophia shook her head and laughed as Micheal called her "Laura Croft who she knew it was was but she wondered if Michael called her that. Shrugging it off Sophia looked to Micheal to Marki and nodded agreeing with Michael."The fun and joy of life is to be weird and unique as possible, if we were all the same how boring would that be?"Sophia asked her softly. "Heck look at me, I'm a weird-o and a freak all mixed in one but honestly I can care less I love who I am!"said Sophia smiling. Sophia was sure Marki loved who she was for she could tell by the way she acted she could care less what people thought of her which was the type of people Sophia liked.

Sophia listened to his story and realized he gave people some of the weirdest nicknames she ever heard in her life. "This man is sure off his rocker like daddy said."Sophia thought to herself shaking her head and chuckling slightly to herself. Sophia smiled when he said he was the one who saved her from Barker for she knew it was him that saved her. Sophia nodded and sighed. "I know what you mean, I hate being in the paper I really do."said Sophia softly.

Marki liked the older man, this Michael character. He seemed to have a knack for the obscure and random, which tended to be the only environment that Marki thrived in. Unfortunately, the world tended to be unwelcome to the Chaos theory and tried to order everything out, have a time and a place for everything, social structure and a mathematical equation to boot... Marki would not mind destroying them all. Everyone decided where they are, when they are, all that jazz. And Hawaiian shirts sounded incredibly nice right now. She knew they had struck her fancy and now she would not be satisfied until she found one... A blue and orange one.

For once she had nothing to say, so she just smiled lightly and began to hum a song from an old Disney movie or something of the same sort. Sophia and Michael began to instruct her on the fact that she was very different and therefore to be treasured. She smiled. Her aunt had once said "When I hear someone described as 'unique' I run for the hills. Unique is another word for off-their-rocker and annoying." Marki had just smiled up at her aunt and asked her in a casual voice how long she had been addicted to her pain pills. That shut her up.

Marki threw up her hands and said, "You won't see my denying my real personality. I'm perfectly content being who I am. It's everyone else who is stifling me." She gestured wildly and accidentally pointed at a man who stopped and motioned to himself questioningly. "Yes, you!" Marki said. "You, sir, are stifling my creative individuality, trying to turn me into a clone, into a zombie. Well, mister, I won't take it! I am no corporate tool, I will not listen to the Man, because I am odd!!!" She beat her fists on her chest as she tossed back her head. When she looked back, the man was gone.

She straightened up and tried to focus her attention back on Michael and Sophia, but they were talking about people Marki didn't know. A paper bag blew by in the breeze. It caught on the end of the bench and Marki snuck around Michael and Sophia and climbed onto the bench on all fours. She crept along, Jeremiah slipping out and sitting on the bench, until she reached the end. She drew back her fist but the paper bag was pulled free. She let out a cry and lept into the air, pouncing on the bag on all fours. "Huzzah! I win! At last. Now if only my nemesis, your plastic brother, would show his face!"