Hate is such a strong word, but that's how I feel about you!

It was a cold cloudy day as Sarah Jessica Nesbitt walked through the crowded street of London pushing a baby stroller. Sarah just gotten back from seeing Sophia after Emma and Emily gotten a fever last night. As it started raining, Sarah chuckled before she rushed into a small cafe. " Hang in there my angels, mommy will get you out of the rain soon. " said Sarah softly. As she reached the cafe drenched in cold rain, she shivered and pushed the door opened entering the warm cafe. Checking the twins, she seen that they were sleep and not wet.

Rolling them over towards a booth in the corner Sarah sat down before she took some napkins ringing out her hair. She knew she already looked horrible due to being up all night with the twins. Ever since Nick left after there fight, Sarah took care of the twins with the help of Sam and her friends. She didn't need Nick anymore, he left her and the twins alone. She felt bad for Hitame, he was pretty going to leave her just like he did to her and Cecilia.

Although her and Sam wasn't going to let Nick hurt Hitame like he hurt her and Cecilia by leaving them. Sarah was now friends with Cecilia and took her side and didn't let Nick near her or the twins. Not like he cared, he left them and haven't seen them since new years day. It been four months, but Sarah didn't care anymore, she didn't need him. She thought she did a month after he left she cried herself to sleep, but now she hated him more than anything.

The rain brought nearly everybody inside, and it so happened to bring Sarah into the small cafe that Nick had been in for the past few hours. Nick debated with himself on going over to talk to her, but he really wanted to see Emma and Emily. She probably hated him, she was probably happy without him, but he really truly did love her. And the past few months had been Hell for him.

He slowly approached the empty seat across from her and spoke before she could. "Sarah, sweetheart. I'm so sorry. I know that I walked out, I know that I shouted at you, and I know that I pushed you to the ground. But we both said things that we didn't mean. But I love you. I need you. I need our daughters." And then he didn't know what else to say or do, everything just came out all at once. He looked over at Emily and Emma and wanted to cry. They had grown so much. He did truly love Sarah and the twins.

Sarah looked at him with anger in her emeralds eyes. " Get the hell away from me and my babies. " said Sarah darkly. Listening to his so called story she rolled her eyes at him. " Go tell your pathetic story to someone who give does a damn!"Sarah spat at him. Hearing Emma cry, Sarah shot him a dirty look. "Thanks alot, you woke her up after she had a fever all night!"said Sarah darkly. " Sh... it's ok Angel mommy here. " said Sarah softly.

Singing softly to Emma she heard Emily started to cry. " Sh... Emmy, it's ok I know it hurts angel. " said Sarah softly. Rocking them in her arms she turned to Nick. " Just leave Nick, the Sarah you knew is long dead, she died when you were drunk and pushed her calling her worthless. " said Sarah. " Yes I remember everything you did to me, pushing me to the ground to calling me worthless and wishing you never had the twins!"said Sarah holding back tears. She wasn't going let him see her cry that was for sure. "All I did was love you, I didn't deserve what you did to me!"said Sarah angrily.

" Heh... I bet you don't even remember half the stuff you said, but I do!"said Sarah. " Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words leave a scar forever!"said Sarah. " I'm honestly surprise you didn't beat me that night, you did everything else. "said Sarah darkly. " But you know what? It made me a stronger person. "said Sarah.

Nick felt like crap, mainly because she was right. He hadn't remembered much of what happened that night. "Sarah I was wrong in doing what I did. And I wish I could go back and change it, but I can't." Nicks voice broke when the twins started crying. He didn't mean to wake them or anything. After they started to settle down, he began to speak again. "I don't know what it will take, but I need you back. I need our daughters. I just need our family back." He said softly. Nick really didn't know another way to say this to her. He truly was sorry, but would she ever forgive him? Nick softly took her hand in both of his. "I love you Sarah, and I know you love me. We have to try and move past this." He said as he held back tears. He couldn't cry in front of her, he had to be strong.

Sarah laughed her cold laugh at him. " Wow... you love me huh, well sure wasn't love the night you left was it?"Sarah asked him coldly. "If you love me, can you explain what that was the night you left? Cause I'm confused. " said Sarah. Sarah looked at him angrily. " You will never have us back, you left us and you think a sorry will solve everything Potter?"Sarah spat at him. "Correction Potter, I did love you but now I hate you more than anything in the world. "said Sarah darkly.

Seeing his look Sarah laughed her cold laugh at him. " Don't remember everything that happened that night?"Sarah asked him angrily. " Well... probably because you were drunk!"said Sarah darkly. " I don't want a drunken alcoholic near my babies!"said Sarah. " Besides if you lived me, you would of never done what you done today me or left!"said Sarah darkly.

Nick knew that they could never be like they were, but he hoped that they could be together again. Nick truly did love Sarah, and even though he walked out on her, it didn't mean he didn't love her. He had only walked away from her that night, because he didn't want to make things worse. But he couldn't tell her that, she wouldn't believe him. She would laugh in his face and call him a liar. She would think it was all bullshit. He had to say something though. He really did want Sarah and his daughters back.

"Sarah.. I really do love you. I love our daughters. I loved every moment I spend with you and the twins. And I want the three of you back. The three of you are everything to me. I did some things that I'm not proud of, and if I could take them back then I would. But I can't." He explained as he looked into her eyes, and with sincerity in his voice. He looked over at the twins who had grown a lot since he'd last seen them. "They've gotten so big.. Can they walk? Talk?" He asked softly.

Sarah looked at him and rolled her eyes at him. " You know you have a really convincing story, but I'm not buying it. " Sarah spat at him. " Did things you're not proud of huh? Well... you should you left me there hurt and bleeding on the floor!"said Sarah. " Who to say if I did get back with you, that won't happen again?"Sarah asked him angrily. "I'm not taking that chance Potter. " Sarah spat at him. " I hate you Nick, I really hate you. " said Sarah.

Seeing Emma reach her hands out Sarah took her out the stroller. " Mama I hungwy!"said Emma softly. " Ok... angel, what do want some pancakes?"Sarah asked as she nodded. Forgetting Nick was there she chuckled before looking at Emily. " Want the same Emmy?"Sarah asked as she nodded. " Plwease?Emily asked she asked her emerald eyes giving her the puppy pout. " Ok you and Em can have pancakes!"said Sarah chuckling as she took Emily out. " May I have two high chair please?"Sarah asked as the waiter nodded and got her two high chairs.

" Mommy ooo is?"Emily asked her looking ar Nick tilting her head. " Mommy Dada?"Emma asked her pointing at Nick as Sarah sighed. " Yes it's Dada, but Dada not in the right mind to see you. " said Sarah softly. " Why dada hwere?'Emily asked "I don't know angel. " said Sarah softly.

"Please Sarah.. It won't happen again." Nick said softly. Watching Sarah and the twins together made Nick upset. They didn't really need him. "I'll be right back." Nick said as he got up and headed twords the bathroom. He returned around ten minutes later with his eyes red and puffy from crying. The twins were in a high chair eating their pancakes. "Sarah I truly do love you." He said softly. "Dada love me too?" Emma asked. Nick got up and kissed the both of them on their forehead. "I love both of you so much. I really missed you two a lot." He said to the children.

"Heh... that's what they all say, and I don't believe it. " said Sarah darkly. As there plates came Sarah cut up there pancakes in small bites. Watching them eat their pancakes she smiled for they really loved pancakes. They were their favorite breakfast food, just like hers. It was amazing how much they were like her, but they had some of Nick in them.

" Don't touch them!"said Sarah in a protective manner of like a mother wolf protective of her cubs. " You don't deserve to touch them or me. " said Sarah darkly. " I don't care if you say you love me, nothing can replace what you done!"said Sarah. " I don't think I can forgive you ever Nick, you hurt me not only physically but emotionally!"Sarah spat at him.

Nick sat back down and looked at his feet. He didn't know what to say anymore. He truly did want her back, but she had been without him, and she learned to live and be okay without him. "Sarah.. I truly am sorry, and I'll do anything to show it. I won't drink anymore. It will be hard, but I won't do it. Because I'd do anything to have you back. Next time we'll sit down and calmly talk about things. Next time I'm pissed, I'll go into a separate room and spend some time calming down. Next time there won't be no next time. Sarah I love you. I love the twins, and even if you don't want me back, we have to at least be friends. They deserve to have their father in their life." Nick couldn't speak anymore. There was a lump in his throat the size of a softball. He looked at the twins again. They were still going at those pancakes like Godzilla on Japan. They were just like Sarah in more ways than they were like Nick. Maybe it wasn't a bad thing they were that way..