Who said you were not worth it?
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Who said you were not worth it?

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Post by Stephen Meyers Fri Dec 01, 2017 3:20 pm

It has been three months. Not one letter, not a notice, nothing. Sometimes Stephen wished they would send Willow just once, even without a letter, but just the howl so that he could have a short glimpse of something that or someone that was part of his home, just to know that he hadn't been forgotten, so he could have a short felling that someone was telling him 'hey, we are waiting for to to come back this Christmas'. But he wasn't. Stephen was not leaving Hogwarts for the holiday season, he never has, and he never will. This year wasn't to be an exception.

As it was the end of another really busy week, Stephen went for a walk after lunch. He had a few homework to get to but he was going to have all weekend to take care of it. Now he was just going to do nothing at all.

At some point he ended up in the courtyard and as it was fall, really close to winter, all students would be inside by then hanging on the fireplaces at their common room's or in the Great Hall where it was always warm and cosy. For that matter, it didn't take him much to find a place to sit for a while dropping his bag (he might have figured that the best way to go for a walk without being bothered was to seem like he was going somewhere and with his bag he could always pretend he was heading to the library or someplace else to study) and sitting down on the bench wondering if it was going to snow on the weekend to come.
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Post by Charlotte Waldorf Sat Dec 02, 2017 4:17 pm

Cross my heart, hope to die
To my lover, I'd never lie
He said "be true" I swear "I'll try"
In the end, it's him and I
He's out his head, I'm out of my mind
We got that love, the crazy kind
I am his and he is mine
In the end, it's him and I

Charlotte was listening to that one song for days. And crying. And then listening to the song again. Then cursing. And then all over again.
Even if she was the one to broke up with Christian, it was still hard. The fact that he really doesn't care about her, hurt her a lot. He wasn't honest with her. He didn't care about her anymore. Actually, he never did.
Because of all these things, Charlotte at the same time liked and hated to be alone with her mind. She didn't feel she was able to talk with people but being alone... It was even worse because when she was alone she had all the time in this world to think about everything that happened. To try to blame herself because Christian didn't like her. To think that, if she was maybe a little bit better girlfriend, he would fight for her.

She didn't even notice when she came out. Charlotte was carrying her books in her right arm because her left was still in bandages. Her arm wasn't broken anymore but it still caused the pain. She saw Stephen and started walking toward him.
"Hi. Mind if I sit?" She said with the forced smile on her face. It's not Stephen the reason she couldn't smile, she liked him, but she just didn't find enough strength to smile these days.
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Post by Stephen Meyers Tue Dec 05, 2017 6:16 pm

Stephen looked for something in the bag and took out a book which he kept in hand unopened. Adjusting himself on the bench he kicked the bag away to the other side of the bench and sat there for a while just looking at the cover of the book in his hands, feeling the hard texture with his freezing hands due to the coldness outside. Well, that was the book his mother had gave him just before he jumped in the train and ever since he had read through half of it and still had no idea why she had given it to him.

It takes a great deal of courage to swim against running waters. Make sure not to drown or to be carried along. For then you will either be dead or not yourself.

The handwritten note in the first page was still a bigger mystery. The story was all about this man that had a mission on killing this dragon. But as soon as he got there he couldn't do it and Stephen had only got to the part when they teamed up against the world, basically.

He sighed softly but didn't have much time to continue with his wonder for when he looked up he saw Charlotte. "Hey" he smiled a bit at her and moved to get his pack closer to him so he could get her some room. "Sure" he said and put it away along with the book. A mystery to another time.

"So... how are you?" he asked in a general sort of speaking not really noticing she was upset. He was not on one of his days either so who was he to judge?
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Post by Charlotte Waldorf Tue Dec 05, 2017 7:36 pm

He made some space for her to sit and she looked at him gratefully. "Thank you," Charlotte said and smiled, this time it was the little but honest smile.
She met Stephen during the holiday and he was really nice and ready to help her even if he probably knew about the girl who used to hate everyone and everything and then suddenly became somehow popular just because she was dating Zabini boy.

How was she? Upset? Angry? Sad? Ready to kill Christian? Maybe everything of that.
"I guess I had better days" it was easier to say that instead of all her feelings. She doesn't need to bother him with that. Maybe she should go to see the psychologist? Those feelings probably are not healthy but she read a lot of books, she knows very well that once she will get over it and be fine again.

"How are you? What were you reading? You don't need to stop because of me. I can find another bench."

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Post by Stephen Meyers Fri Dec 08, 2017 4:39 pm

Stephen left the bag on the ground and turned to look up at her finally seeing that something was going on which was stated by her right after. At first Stephen was silent wondering if she was to evolve the topic but she didn't seem to be willing to so he stood quiet about it for a little longer. He did not want to make her talk of something she didn't want to so he decided to let the decision of her telling him about her to her own judgement.

"I'm cool" he said distractedly rubbing his hands one against the other not noticing the pun. "Oh, it was just a book my mother gave me. I was not reading it anymore anyway" he shrugged not really wanting to talk about it. He seriously did not understand them. Why to give him stuff like this during his time at home and not send him any letters about anything over the school year? Why not even asking if he was coming home for Christmas? Well, he wasn't but he would like to be asked...

"How is your arm?" he asked in an attempt to change the subject to something that wasn't so Stephen-related.
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Post by Charlotte Waldorf Sun Dec 10, 2017 11:14 am

"You seem to be close to your mother. My mother... She never bought me present, she just gives me money to buy something by myself. I know, now you will think that there is nothing to complain about, but she just never has time for me. I was always on my own" she shrugged. In the past, that made her sad but then she realized that she can't change her mother. In some weird way, Amelia Waldorf was trying to be a good mother. But for her, nothing was more important than hospital and her patients.

"My arm?" She looked at him confused for a little bit.
"Oh, it's fine I guess, my mother gave me some pills for pain" because of all this with Christian she almost forgot that there was something wrong with her arm.

She needed to tell someone. She really did. Of course, she said to Clair but... They don't really talk in that way.
"I.. I broke up with Christian" and then, just like that, she started crying.
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Post by Stephen Meyers Sun Dec 10, 2017 4:53 pm

"I think you can say that" Stephen nodded a bit but that was all he ever said about it. He did not understand exactly what kind of relationship he had with his mother... Yes, they got along pretty nicely when he was home during the Summer, but then during the rest of the year she would just ignore him. She was perhaps the only one that sent him letters and Adriana through her ever since she learned how to write, but still even when she did they seemed empty and emotionless... Stephen shook those thoughts off of his head not wanting to get all depressed when he had some company.

He quietly nodded at that. "That's good" he said smiling a little.

But it was to her confession that Stephen was paralysed... For a moment he was reactionless not knowing what to tell her. He was never very good at comforting others but maybe that was because he lacked on comforting himself. But that did not matter. He furrowed his eyebrows and looked up at her just in time to see her breaking. "I'm so sorry" he said softly and moved his hand to her shoulder so e could pat her not knowing what else to do. "Do you want to talk about it?" he asked in the same manner.
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Post by Charlotte Waldorf Sun Dec 10, 2017 5:03 pm

"I... I... I think there is nothing to talk about" she promised herself yesterday that she won't cry anymore because of Christian. She promised that to herself and she failed.
"He just... he doesn't care about me. He never did" Charlotte shook her head and for the brief moment stopped talking in order to try to stay calm. Or to get calm.

"I even started working at his stupid shop during the holiday so I can be with him. While almost all my friends I was dying to see were having fun, went to the pool or cinema, I was there working like slave and he didn't even seem to be aware of my presence" she swiped her tears angrily. Now she was almost screaming. But she didn't care. Screaming was good.

"I just don't know why he decided to be with me in the first place. He could tell he doesn't like me. I would be a little bit sad but I wouldn't feel like an idiot. And now I feel like the idiot. He is... I don't even know what he is. If I... if I was like before, if I didn't let myself to care about people here, none of this would happen."
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Post by Stephen Meyers Sun Dec 10, 2017 7:36 pm

Stephen kept his silence for as long as Charlotte felt like talking and patted her shoulder. Really, what else could he do more than that? He knew not who that boy was. And despite being acquainted to Charlotte for as long as he had came to Hogwarts they had just met during the Summer.

He didn't mind the screaming or how eager she was to let it out. To let it all out. He was even glad she was doing so and almost wished others would do the same other than just stand there and glance at him every once in a while to check if he had been gone already. Some people did not even deserved a family...

"I don't know who he is, but I can tell you what he is. He is a great jerk to do that to you" Stephen said eventually.
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Post by Charlotte Waldorf Sun Dec 10, 2017 7:49 pm

"I know, right?" Charlotte looked at him again but she didn't really see him because all of that tears in her eyes.
"He is a jerk. I tried my best to be the good girlfriend and make him happy but he... but he..." She didn't finish that. Stephen is younger than her and she didn't want to curse. It wasn't who she is. She is the one who is always calm, polite and with a smile on her face. And now she was crying and screaming while people were passing by and looking at her like she was insane.

"I'm sorry for bothering you with this but I just... I needed to say to someone. And you are really nice and you were ready to listen and I'm so grateful for that. Thank you" she looked at him again and hugged him for a second.

"God I'm not sure I even asked you how are you. I'm sorry"
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