My turn to play the villain

First news that surprised Hayley Sierra after a few days of silents were that Sebastien O'Sullivan is on Hogwarts.
It's nice, the way things goes in life. Hayley never asked for anything, well one little thank you would be nice. But she saved Sebastien's life, and he just ignored her like she's the most irrelevant person in the world. Except she's his cousin. And she did save his life and she kept his secret, and she never pressured him about it (except she told him that he has one month to tell Christian truth or she will).
And he never told her he'll be on Hogwarts too. Well, he probably didn't know that she's here, which is impossible cause she sent him not one, not two, but three owls. He never looked for her.
That's why Hayley decided to pay a visit to her cousin. And not just that. The month has passed, and so does his chance to talk to Christian and explain everything. It's time for her to react.

Library is the one and only place that Hayley could attach to Sebastien, so she was headed to that place, the one she never used as a student (she would took the book and that read next to the lake or in her bedroom).
The halls were full of kids, but the only thing Hayley could see were the big doors of the school library. She noticed few students, one of them fell from the broom last week while they were playing quidditch. Luckily, there wasn't much harm.
Hayley stood for a second, thinking about what will she say to Sebastian. She was never ready when it comes to her older cousin, but she was pretty stubborn about this one. Here we go, she thought before she walked into the library.
She saw him immediately, he was standing next to the shelf, few meters away. Although he was turned so she couldn't see his face, Hayley was more than sure that it was Sebastian. Hair and black clothing were enough to her to be one hundred percent sure.
"Cousin!" she said loudly, biting her lip remembering she was in the library. They said this is the place you should be quite - definitely not the place for Hayley. As Sebastien turned she approach him angrily, arms folded. "Nice to see you Sebastien. You okay?"

Sebastien had been ignoring Hayley's letter ever since he came back from Norway. Although he knew she saved him, thinking about her made him thinking about what was happening before she arrived. He hasn't been ready to talk with her just yet. He left Oslo in a hurry, after the dark had been fallen and the full moon was near, he sneaked out, he stopped only for a minute, to whisper 'Thank you.' to a sleeping figure in front of the TV. He didn't even shut the TV down. That may woke her up and she would request an explanation that he couldn't give her, not even one.
So he left her without saying goodbye. He was sure she won't be surprised. They knew each other for a long time, and this wasn't the first time when O'Sullivan decided to vanish. His whole family already got used to that.

However, he found out that he needs to speak with Hayely as soon as possible, the only thing was that he couldn't make himself to go look for her. They need to discuss about something. Something that Sebastien found quite important. His privacy.
He felt betrayed. Hayley betrayed his trust with spreading important information about him to random people. Information she had no right to spread.
He thought he knew Hayley well enough and he never thought she'll do something like that. Sebastien never assumed she'll tell Lilyanya he's a werewolf, especially since he stressed that no one needs to no for his problem unless he told it by himself, and so far he hasn't gotten an argue to do so.

His body stiffen when he heard Hayley's voice. What's she doing in Hogwarts at the first place? He concluded that she's in London after speaking to Lilyanya but never thought he will found her in Hogwarts. Especially in the library. He never seen her there even when she was schooling, so why now? "Hayley." He leaned on a shelf he was sorting out. "I'm good thank you, and you?"

She was scared of this moment. But it had to happen. Now, No more waiting, no more delays. It was the time. It was time to put down the masks, time for truth to be spoken. As much as Hayley was loyal, she couldn't hold it no more. She was falling apart and wasn't able to talk with anyone about it. But it will finally be over, soon. She promised herself, no more lying. As soon as she talks to Sebastien, she's going to Christian. Curtains will fall tonight. And they can hate her if they want, she never cared less about it. Only thing she was able to think about was freedom, and secrets she was keeping were destroying every single part of it.
She tried, she did her best not to stand between brothers, but her time to play the bad one has came.

"To be completely honest? I'm dying of all the things that remain unspoken. I'm dying of all those lies I have told and all those secrets that I have to keep, but who cares? You don't, Christian doesn't and my mother doesn't know a thing. So thank you for asking, cousin. I'm terrible."
Her voice was quiet but cold. She tried to be calm, but her voice still tremble slightly. Hayley closed her eyes and took deep breath, remembering why she came. Be strong, she repeated to herself.

The library wasn't a place for such discussions. She turned around, looking for a more private place but all she saw were the kids all around the place. Some of them were reading and some were curiously watching in their direction. She turned to Sebastien, arms crossed over her chest.
"Is there any place we can talk, like, right now?" she was trying to stay calm, but she wanted to jump around and scream and let it all out. "Private place." She added fast before he got the chance to say anything.

Sebastien hated himself for making his cousin feel so miserable he guessed she felt but he couldn't give up. Not this time, not with this. Even if he decide to tell his brother the truth how would he do it? Does he need just to visit his office in the Daily Prophet during his lunch break and tell him he became a monster? That he became a beast Christian hated more than anything in his life? No matter how many times Hayley said him he needed to tell Christian he couldn't make himself to do so. He doubted he could survive the look of pure disgust in his brother's eyes. Christian, Hayley and Jenna were the only members of his family left, beside them he had no other relatives, so how could he tell his brother knowing that will ruin every bit of relationship these two guys had.

"I'm sorry." He said, maybe even too quiet for she to hear, he wasn't sure. Sebastien rarely apologized but apology was the only thing he could offer to Hayley, he couldn't say to her he'll tell Christian. She deserved truth this time, thought he was sure she would know he's lying this time so telling lies had no point. Especially if he hoped she'll keep his secret.

Sebastien noticed a few confused views of the students, but no one interrupted them. He doubted they could hear their conversation, even if they could they couldn't understand it, but they were probably only surprised to see a librarian and a Quidditch coach speaking. Who would guess they would have anything in common? However Bastien didn't wanted to risk their upcoming conversation being heard so he just turned on his heel and led Hayley in some more private part of the library. He stopped in between shelves with books written by Muggle authors, deciding this was private enough and turned around waiting for Hayley to speak. Or maybe he should offer her tea first?

"Yeah, me too." Hayley was never scared of rejection, until now. She wasn't the type of person who would cry for people, she never shared deep emotions with anyone. Sure, she loved. She loves feeling loved, she loves to love. But when it comes to losing people and saying goodbye, she's an expert. However, thought that she may lose her favorite cousin was killing her.
She avoided his gaze while she was talking, scared of his reactions when he learns the truth.
"It doesn't matter now. At least not as much as this thing that we need to talk about. I mean, it is, it's all connected but you don't know it, I mean, how could you? And I'm not sure how to say it, because it isn't my secret, it's Chris'."
Realising that this won't take her anywhere, she stopped talking. She couldn't find the correct words, she had no idea how to say this. Nervously biting her lip, she clenched her fists. There was no turning back, not now.

While they were walking, Hayley caught few titles. In normal circumstances she would laugh at it, but now she was too tense for smiles. If she only told him everything years ago, or at least that day when she found him, everything would be different. If only Christian never told her.
When Sebastien stopped walking, she bumped into him. Afraid that she may not be able to stand, she landed back on the shelf. Before she met his gaze, she took one big breath.

"You see, I can't do this anymore. I'm planning to leave, for good this time. But before I do, I need to make sure that you too finally..." trying to find correct words, she realized that she wasn't so sure about her final goal. "...move on. You need to move on. You're so scared, both of you. You're hiding behind masks, you're ignoring your biggest problems by solving something that happened ages ago." It was clear that she was talking about his mother.
"We should have talked about this long time ago, but I, I couldn't. You know I hate secrets because they tend to stay secret. And as much as I'm good at keeping them, I hate them. I promised Chris I will never tell you, but I have to. And I promised you I will not share your secret with anyone and than I told it to someone who obviously knows you. So, I'm sorry for that."
Feeling guilty, she took a break, waiting for him to say something. However, he was just standing there, watching her. There was something in that look, something that truly scared her. "Say something. Yell at me. Or don't, we're in the library. Just stop watching me like that, like I'm the biggest enemy. It hurts."

All that Sebastien O'Sullivan could do was to stand there with arms crossed on his chest and look blankly at his cousin. He could admit that he had no idea what's she talking about but he recognized her nervous habit of talking a lot when she's not sure if he'll like the thing she wants to say. Hayley did that in 90% of their conversations, always concerned about what will he do next. Bastien couldn't say that she doesn't have a reason for that, it was true that he is a black sheep of the whole O'Sullivan-Sierra family, and even he could admit that he's too moody sometimes, but he never forced any of them to hang out with him, did he? Privacy was the thing he appreciated the most, never pried into their lives and expected the same in return, but somehow, some of them, usually it would be Christian, would cross the line and that would escalate with quarrel, which usually results with at least one month of not talking with his brother.

Thought this ex-Slytherin usually didn't care about his brother's secrets he couldn't deny the spark of curiosity caused with Hayley's weird behavior. Feeling hard spines of books on his back he focused on Hayley trying to process every her word hoping he might find the reason why is she worried about that at the first place. Everything she said till now didn't have any meaning, despite her attempt to persuade him to tell the truth to Christian, he didn't see any other reason why she came here today, she could send him an owl with the same efficiency. Not that he didn't love his family, he just liked when they're not around him all the time, he could even say he loved them more when there's a distance between them interrupted only with rare meetings, and he seen enough of Hayley and Christian for current month.

His lips twitched as she mentioned theirs allegedly wearing masks, of course he knew on which event from the past she alludes, but he didn't want to think about it, he left that part of his life in his past, along with much less moody and less screwed up version of himself, and if he's the one to ask, that will stay in the past. Library just wasn't the place for sharing heartbreaking stories, besides that, she already knew his, he didn't see a reason to do that again. "Say what? I still don't know what are you talking about, so how am I supposed to give you my opinion then?"