Nom, Nom, Nom

Jack slid smoothly into the Kitchen, beaming at the small swarm of house elves who quickly came to tend to her beck and call. She grinned, knowing them quite well, seeing as she always snuck down here for midnight snacks, like tonight. She slipped the Marauder's Map, her most coveted and secret possession, into her pocket after wiping it clean and went to business.

She passed down all of their suggestions of baking her new food and whatnot and she said, "I'll just have some left overs. Preferably dessert, but you know me. I'm not picky. Food is food." She laughed heartily and the elves scampered off.

Jack summoned up a chair and pushed it over to a wall, collapsing on it and deciding she would relax for a bit. She had not been sleeping well so at least she could concentrate and filling herself up on her midnight guilty pleasures.

The elves brought her some pumpkin juice, treacle tart, a few biscuits, and other assorted goodies. She thanked them profusely and began to tuck into the tart, surfacing only to swig some of the pumpkin juice. After awhile, she slowed down and leaned the back, resting her head against the wall as she allowed herself to get lost in thought about the year ahead.

Chase stuck her head out of the portrait from her common room and glanced around. No Prefects, three, two, one... GO! She dashed out of the common room and walked down the hall, tickling the pear, she heard a soft giggle, and then turned the doorknob. "Hey all!" She said smiling down at the house elves that immediately surrounded her. "Hey, wanna get Calla for me?" She asked smiling. "And maybe some of that pumpkin juice... some chocolate would be good to, thanks so much." She said smiling.

Without looking around the room, she found the nearest bench and sat down on it, waiting for Calla to appear. Finally the older house elf came up to her and bowed low. "No need to bow Calla, sit up here." Calla hopped onto the bench and smiled at Chase. "How are you doing? Is there anything I can get you? "She asked lightly, looking at the house elf. "No Missus! I am doing great! I loves to help here, and there is so much to be done!" The house elf squeaked and smiled up at Chase. Chase smiled lightly and patted her on the head. "That's good to hear.." She said softly, before catching her bottom lip between her teeth, she bit on it for a few seconds before looking back at the house elf. "Run on off now." She said softly, and then turned around on the table as the house hopped off the seat.

That's when Chase finally saw Jack. Her whole body numbed, her mind froze, and she sat staring at her for a long moment. So this was how it would be? This was how she would find out, Chase had to tell her.. had to tell her everything, and she hoped to Merlin that she wouldn't get to mad at her. Or at Elijah either, this was Chase's fault.. and she had to deal with the consequences. She slowly got up and went over to Jack. "Hey..." She said, not sitting down, but standing across the table from her awkwardly. "Can we... can we talk?" She asked softly, watching as the house elves brought her the food and set it down on the table in front of where she was standing.

Jack watched as Chase entered and she began to talk to the elves. Jack saw that she had not noticed her and found no need to make it so. She continued to eat, staring at her food as she felt her gut hollowed even more. She wanted to go back to being friends with Chase, but she could not bring herself to make it happen. Chase had tried to do things with Vito. She had hid her relationship with Andrew from Jack. She had broke Andrew's heart.

Jack did not know what to do. She was not sure if she really wanted to be Chase's friend for the sake of their friendship, or because that would mean Jack could stop feeling guilty about everything. Jack had no idea what she was supposed to think about the situation, or how she was supposed to proceed.

And suddenly, Chase was there, telling Jack that she needed to tell her something. She looked up and gave her a forced smile, forcing happy words out of her mouth. "He-ey, Chase." She grinned at Chase, feeling small and sad... Whenever Chase had to tell her something, it had made Jack feel insignificant and terrible about herself. Needless to say, she was worried about what Chase had to say. "Mhmm... Sure..."

Chase felt a huge amount of fear in the pit of her stomach with the way that Jack looked when Chase came up to her. She took a small step backwards, and almost considered letting Jack find out some other way. Tears filled her eyes, she had been less then great to Jack and Andrew, she had been a downright horrible person. Taking a deep breath, Chase sat down across from Jack, and picked up her pumpkin juice. Biting her lip she stared into the depths of her goblet before taking a drink.

Her face felt like it was stinging from how red her cheeks were. Her eyes were still smarting from the last time she had cried, and they hurt to blink as she drank out of the goblet. She looked down and saw that her favorite kind of hot chocolate was sitting in front of her. She smiled and then looked at Jack. "I'm a horrible person.." She whispered finally, letting the goblet rest on the table, her hand still clenched around it. "But... you have to know.. from me this time, not from seeing me.. not from someone else, I have to tell you, I do..." She said emphasizing I in each of her sentences.

"Jack... did you know that Elijah was a famous painter from Paris? Yeah well.. he told me that when I first met him.. on the train.." She bit her lip and could feel the tears already forming in her eyes, and she hugged herself around the middle, not even looking at the things in front of her, her eyes focused on Jack. "Well.. Elijah told me he wanted to paint me.. so we met in the Room of Requirement.." She bit her lip and sighed. "He dressed me in only a sheet... and had me stand, posed and he took pictures, and started to paint me... except.. my hair wouldn't do what he wanted it to do." She said, suddenly launched into her story, there was no turning back now.

"Jack.. there was so much tension between us, I could have cut the air with a knife.. he said we couldn't cut corners... and then.. well.. we had sex." She said shaking her head. "I know, I'm a slut, I'm a whore, call me what you will.. but that isn't what I want to tell you." She said her eyes still focused on Jack, slow tears falling down her cheeks. "I wasn't feeling good one day, So I went to the nurse... and she gave me some vitamins... because.. well..." Chase took a huge, deep breath and finally said the words that were so painful to get out these days.

"I'm pregnant with his child Jack.." She whispered and closed her eyes.

Chase seemed to have realized that she had caused a lot of issues, and she seemed truly, sincerely sorry for it. Jack felt something well up in her chest and in her throat. She would forgive Chase, whatever it was. She knew it, she would forgive her and move on, even if it was srtill awkward, at least there would be no tough feelings.

But if Chase was just here to rave about how amazing Eli was, Jack just wanted to vomit and then leave. Jack never liked putting up with fangirls, and if that was what Chase had become, she would deal with her once the obsession was gone. But there seemed to be a point to the story and when Chase said they had... done things (Jack did not even like to think the words) Jack's eyes widened.

Jack may have been rude and callous and tough, but when it came to such dealings, she was surprisingly innocent. She could not be seductive to save her life. Many people speculated she still believed in cooties. She had never had a boyfriend. So these things that pushed their way into her life, always frightened her. You would think that by being around someone like Vito, she would not be so out of her depth... and yet... here she was...

Oh but the fun was only beginning... Chase was pregnant.

Jack stared at her, her eyes still wide, her eyebrows raised in shock and disbelief, her mouth slightly open. She felt those feelings she had had at the beginning of Chase's speech, the ones where she knew they would fix everything. They were still there... But they were about to be beaten to a pulp by her anger.

She leaped up. "What?! Are you freaking insane?!" She probably should not be yelling a pregnant girl, but Jack always ended up in these situations. "Or are you just stupid!? How could you let that happen!? How could you be so selfish, Chase!? Did you even think about how Andrew is going to react to this? He's already tore up because you broke up with him! How am I supposed to be okay with you putting him through more hell, or do you want me to up and stop being friends with him like you did?! And what about this poor kid!? It's not easy being born into the life of a teenager!" She was becoming more incensed. In a slightly hysterical voice, she bellowed, "How could you do this, Chase?!"

Chase saw the anger as it bellowed up in Jack, and suddenly she was up and yelling at her. Chase winced and felt each word sting, each word tore her insides out, peeling back what chance she had of feeling a little better, every thing Chase did was a mistake.. and now? Now she had a baby on the way, and it was Elijah Krums.. Chase could feel her hands shaking, as Jack yelled down at her. She wasn't a tall girl, but Chase was sitting, and the yelling made her feel worse and worse.

Chase blinked back her tears and looked up at Jack. There was nothing she could respond to her anger, because she was right. Chase was a jealous, good for nothing, rotten, horrible being. Who had has sex with Elijah Krum, and was paying the price for it. Chase had slide down farther in her seat at every insult, at every word of anger, so she was barely above the top of the table, before she slowly sat up, and put her hands on the table in front of her. "Yes.." She said finally, clasping her hands so tightly her fingers were going white. "Yes.. I am stupid.. and selfish.. and insane.. I didn't mean for it to happen Jack.." She whispered, her voice hoarse.

"If I could, I would go back and take it back.." she whispered, her whole body shaking still. "It was a heat of the moment thing.. I.. I didn't want this.. I never wanted to hurt Andrew as much as I did.. as I have.. as I am." She said looking up at Jack. "I know you probably hate me.. you should just.. hit me, fight me.. I don't care... I deserve everything you do to me Jack.." She whispered, her eyes now on her hands. "It'll be born after I graduate.. so it won't be like I'll be at school with it.." She said carefully.

"And Elijah is going to stay with me.." She said slowly. "I don't.. I don't know what all there is between us.. but.." she shook her head and tears slipped out from behind her eyes, falling down her cheeks lightly. "I hate myself, for everything I've done, for all that I have done, I hate myself... and I wish I could go back.. but there is no going back this time, no memory charm strong enough for this one, I've hurt to many, and lost so much.. I just.." She stopped and finally looked up at Jack.

"Jack.. I just thought you should know from me this time.. instead of from what you see.. because I didn't tell you about me and Andrew, and that was a horrible thing to do... I thought you should know before the rumors start up, before the teachers start talking about it in class.. I wanted YOU to know.. because.. even if you hate me.. I still want to be your friend.." She felt the tears pick up in pace, and she finally buried her face in her arms, unable to look at Jack any longer.

Jack stared at Chase as tears began to fill her friend's eyes. Jack began to shake with anger, and before she could even finish hearing Chase out, she was screaming, louder than before, "STOP CRYING!" The elves let out terrified squeaks and hid from view, but Jack was staring at Chase. She was not getting her pity.

"You always cry, and it's your own damn fault. Stop making yourself cry!" Her words sounded like an order. "I've had so much happen to me, you have caused sh!t for me and I have not cried once. You don't get to cry." Her eyes shone with intensity and anger, the frustration of a terrible summer radiating from her being.

Now Jack was getting pissed that she wanted to take the kid back... "You don't get to take this back. You did this, you have to deal with this." Chase said that Eli was going to stay with her and Jack felt more frustration. "Wow, how chivalrous of him," she snarled. She hated this whole situation, she hated everything, and she was not feeling better any time soon.

Chase began to apologize about not telling Jack about... well, everything... Jack looked away in anger, pursing her lips, refusing to believe that this was the real reason she was still so upset with Chase. Deep down, she knew it was true, but she would nebver admit it... Becuase Jack had been so happy to find that she had friends over the summer... And then they had abandoned her, treated her like crap, not trusted her. While they had been snogging, she had been thrown against walls, almost strangled, dealing with things she could barely handle. While they had been cuddling, Vito had been slipping her drinks, had been punching walls, building up and breaking down hope. "Thank you for your consideration," Jack said, her words dripping with snide bitterness.

Chase said she still wanted to be Jack's friend and Jack re-exploded, all over again. "Why?! Why the hell would you want to be friends with me?! I'm screaming at you! I sided with the man who killed your family! I more or less sided with Andrew after your break up! What do I have that you want? Need someone beat up for you or something!? What do you want from me!? Why do you want to my freaking friend?!"

Chase bit her lip when Jack yelled at her to stop crying. She closed her eyes for a long moment, and then looked up at Jack, as she yelled at her. "You could have cried." She whispered, completely beaten down. "No one was stopping you! No one told you 'Jack you may not cry!'" Chase said and finally felt something snap inside her. She wasn't going to take this shit. There was no reason she should take getting yelled at like this. In the back of Chase's head she registered that she was having a mood swing, and somehow it made her angry.

Chase stood up and pushed herself away from the table. "Why do I want to be your friend?" She asked and held up a finger. "You were the only one decent to me almost all of last year, I enjoy being in your company, even if all I get is yelled at and beaten into the ground... because I can't say I am the only one to blame here!" She said growling. "You sided with the man who killed my family! Had you just thought about the shit you were getting yourself into, and maybe just maybe stuck by me on that train, instead of immediately thinking I was a SLUT, because I was talking to Elijah Krum!" She could feel herself shaking now.

"If you had stayed by me on that train, I wouldn't be like this right now!" She said pointing to her stomach. "Because I only talked to Elijah because everyone else in the world had left me! My family dead, my boyfriend, gone, my best friend pissed, I went to the first person who was relatively nice to me! Is that such a bad thing to do? It just so happened to be Elijah! All because YOU had to go and defend a man who killed my entire family, defend a man who has done nothing but hurt you!" She glared at Jack.

"So yes, I was stupid, yes, I was looking for a bit of sympathy! But this is NOT all of my fault! Andrew broke up with ME if you forgot! My head was no prepared for another two weeks of wallowing! So I helped people! I'm an idiot okay? I'm a stupid, hormone filled teenager who has no idea what she just got herself into! But maybe had you just stopped and thought about who you were making friends with this summer!" She spun around and stared at the opposite wall.

Chase's voice was shaking with anger and hurt now. Her mind was buzzing and she was so angry at Jack. She had hoped that maybe telling Jack would make it better, make it that much more easy to handle. But now? Now the only one she truly had was Elijah.. the man who had gotten her pregnant, the man that was making her lose all her friends, that all of her friends hated. Everything about Elijah was telling her that she should just walk away and deal with this on her own. Get out of school, and deal with this now, get a nice house in the middle of nowhere, where no one could reach her, and no one could hurt her. Because that was all people ever did to her.

Chase turned and looked at Jack again, her eyes shining in anger. "So this summer.. while you were dealing with an emotional poltergeist, lets see." She held up her fingers. "I had just lost my family to said poltergeist, I was attacked by demons, attacked by the same poltergeist, sure I had Andrew, but all he ever wanted to do is have sex alright? I didn't know a damn thing about him! That's why I can't be with him right now! Because the only thing he would want is to have sex.. and go right back to sitting on the couch.." She shook her head. "I do not want that! I don't want to be treated like I'm just a body! So yes, you had a tough time, this summer, whatever the hell happened, I don't even care right now.. but you try and lose everything you knew and loved, have your entire world pulled out from under you, consider becoming a Death Eater, then get on a train, finally feeling happy, to find that the only person you think you can trust, just left you! Your best friend listens to you, then goes off and sneers at you when you are making another friend in this world. Because when I was in that train compartment alone, I realized that I was alone, you hated me, no.. you HATE me, Andrew didn't want me, I had no family..." She groaned loudly and turned to look at the house elves, who were cowering in fear before them.

"Jack, I came from a family, where everything was hunky dory... I came from a loving home, where I was given three square meals a day, nothing went wrong, everything was happy. I had the perfect life, okay? I admit it, I had a perfect life! And then, a man comes, and kills it all... I had just woke up to find that a VAMPIRE wanted to be my boyfriend, I had Sophia Lestrange as my friend, and that was it! I had just lost my entire memory from the last YEAR! I was still recovering when I was thrown into a world that was not my own, now you try and do that, you try and do that and not end up like I am today!" She growled and finally backed away from her. "I don't need this." She said and spun around, heading to the door.

"I could not have cried, because you always were. In this world, there always needs to be someone strong, someone shouldering the weight of everyone else who are too busy moping so that the whole world does not fall to shambles. And guess what?! That's ME!" She jerked a thumb at herself, feeling anger rise up in her.

"Yeah, I 'sided' with him or whatever. But that's my own damn fault. You could have disowned me at any time and I would have taken it without complaint! So you need to decide whether or not you are going to hold it against me, and stick to that! You wither hate me for it, or accept that I was doing the only damn thing I knew what to do!"

"And I never said you were a slut for talking to Eli! There is nothing wrong with Eli, I have no problem with him! I have a problem when my friends break up, and then I see the other one reverting to bad habits that got her in trouble before. The last time you got drunk and started smoking you wanted to have sex with the only person I had all summer!" She had never revealed how upset she had been by this turn of events. Now it was out. She was mad that Chase had worked her way into the part of Jack's life that Jack did not want her in. Did not want anyone in.

"And I only left you to save you from the demons, okay? Stop acting like I abandoned you at every turn, because I put myself through hell to ensure that the one person sworn to hurting you would focus his energies on me instead of you!" All because YOU had to go and defend a man who killed my entire family, defend a man who has done nothing but hurt you!

Jack jerked back slightly, moving away from the table, staring at Chase. Those words had been running through Jack's head all summer, accusing her. But Jack had told herself she knew she was doing the right thing. She had to believe that, or there was nothing holding Vito back... In a quiet, dangerous voice she said, "You think I don't know that?" She began to shake as Chase continued on.

"You can't blame everyone else Chase, and you can't put all the blame on yourself. The first is ignorant, and the letter is just pathetic! Just own up to the fact that you were wronged, and then you screwed up!" She accused Jack of hating her and Jack seized a glass, throwing it against the wall. "STOP SAYING I HATE YOU!"

Jack stared at Chase, her chest heaving in anger and her hands shaking like mad. "I don't hate you. I don't hate Vito. I don't hate Andrew. Stop saying I hate people!" She glared at Chase. "I may be like Vito in a lot of ways but I don't hate. And I don't murder. And I did not ruin your life, so you need to stop making me feel like I did so that I can live my life without thinking I don't deserve to be happy or alive."

"And so you had a perfect like, whoopdee-freaking-dee! Ever heard the expression 'don't cry because its over, smile because it happened?' There are some people who lived their lives not being loved. Who had no friends, whose family detested them, who pushed everyone away because it was going to happen anyway. And they got a taste of your so called perfect life and got it pulled away before they could even wholly realize what they had. And the worst thing was, they caused it. And they have to live the rest of their lives with that. There are some people who only offered love and protection, and lost all of that. There are some people who live their life knowing at any moment it is going to be gone, and they will have never known good feelings- hope and love and care." She glared at Chase. "And it's not those people's fault. But they deal with it." She whipped away and kicked a chair over before crossing the room, walking away from the door. "Maybe you don't need this."

Chase was shaking with anger now. "You are such a hypocrite Jack!" She shouted, staring at her. "You tell me not to say you hate me, but I can see that there is hate somewhere, and it's for yourself!" She cried out and spun around, pacing in front of Jack. She felt the need to get everything out on the table, but she was so pissed at everything Jack said. Not fault, mistakes, not blame, problems. She was saving her from demons, people didn't have perfect lives. It all lodged itself in her brain, and she could feel her chest heaving with anger.

Jack had thrown something, but Chase wasn't sure what, but it made her whip out her wand, and stand there holding it at Jack. She wouldn't throw a spell until Jack did, but for now, the threat was evident. She had stopped at the door, staring back at Jack as she walked towards the other end of the room. Her hand was shaking, but she felt herself suddenly calming down. She closed her eyes and thought about it all. And from her perspective, this is how things went:

This summer, her family had been murdered, she had met Andrew, liked him, moved in. Jack had revealed that she was on her side, so she went to go deal with it, wanting to know why this man had killed her parents, almost being raped in the process. Just like this man had raped her mom, but she had gotten away from him, her mom didn't. Attacked, attacked again, and still more attacks, all fighting to physically harm her, sure there was stuff she didn't know, like what happened what Jack and Vito were together. But somehow it always came back to them whenever Chase thought of Jack.

She stood in the doorway of the kitchens, her wand arm lowered to her side, her wand pointed at the floor. "I hate this.." she whispered, staring at the ground. "We both care so much, that we conflict.." She said slowly. "conflict with each other against who we care about the most.. I cared about my family.. you care about Vito for reasons I won't ever know.." She said slowly. "There has to be good in there somewhere right?" She said slowly. "Somewhere... I thought that too a long time ago... to some people, experiences make that even stronger of a thought, for others it tears you into pieces, and makes you realize how stupid you are for thinking that." She said slowly. "For you, you realized that everyone DOES have good in them.. for me, it was the opposite.." She took a deep, calming breath.

"Maybe Vito does have something in him that's good.. maybe I'm all wrong, and maybe I'm just F*** stupid.." She stared at Jack's back for a long moment. "We both are F*** stupid." she ran her hand through her hair and shoved her wand back into her pocket roughly. "I have a baby on the way..." She said glancing at her stomach. "And you have a man.. who in all sense of the word, except for reality, is like your child.. you care for him.. and I'm sorry." She said moving forward now. "I know it doesn't help anything, but sometimes it helps to hear it... I'm sorry I messed with your life, I'm sorry that I got in the way, and made you choose, I'm sorry that this all happened." She stopped not far from Jack, barely out of arms length. "I'm sorry I care to much for you... so much that I didn't want you around him, in case he hurt you.." She said softly.

"I'm sorry me and Andrew never told you about us, I'm sorry we didn't work out.." She stared at Jack, her jaw set. "I'm sorry we completely ruined your thoughts for what friends are... I'm sorry we won't ever eat brownies outside of Honeydukes again.. I'm sorry I'm pregnant.. I'm sorry that alcohol makes me sexual, but if it helps.. I wasn't drunk when me and Elijah were together.. and either was he..." She said shaking her head. "That didn't help... I'm sorry I smoke... even though I can't now, because it'll hurt it." She said wrapping her arms around her protectively, not for her safety, but of the babies.

"I'm sorry I can't just say I don't care, because I do... and I wish I didn't, I'm sorry that I wish you were happy.. and that we could look at each other again without a glare in our gaze..I'm sorry... that this doesn't help anything, even though I wish it did.. I'm sorry I wish that it did.." she said and shook her head, turning around. "I'm sorry I yelled at you, and called you a hypocrite, I'm sorry that I made you so angry that you threw something.. and I'm sorry.. I'm sorry for all of that and more.. I'm sorry I disappointed you... I wish I could go back, but I can't.. and that's what you keep telling me, we have to live with our mistakes, and I'm sorry that I wish you could forgive me, even though you can't either..."

Chase looked up at her, and then walked towards the door again. "I'm going back to my Common Room.... I'm... I'm sorry." She said and ran out of the room, letting the portrait close with a soft bump, as she ran down the corridor, said her password, and disappeared into her common room, tears welling again, but she pushed them down, knowing there was nothing she could do for Jack anymore.